Of course, there are likely as many or more of “our more religious members” who don’t work the Steps – at least not to completion or not literally – and their sobriety is as strong as anyone’s too. Going to AA meetings did not get me sober. The spiritual awakening in Step 12 that led me to that “Silkworth psychic change” was the realization that I really could change my attitude and actions; I could change old thinking and habits into new thinking and habits. Thanks so much, Alex, for writing this most appropriate and well written article; thanks Roger for publishing it. In the back of the book is a copy of the Eight Week Step Study Guide which was used for the Step Study sessions. It said I needed God. Over time I began drinking not for relief, but to relieve a craving for more I developed after taking that first drink. Giving up driving and walking was not difficult compared to losing my speech. ... Design for Living. We do need to do something, yes, we do need to make some changes, yes, we do need to start living our lives based on some principles which are less self-centered and with more good-will toward the world at large, yes, but we need to stop being stuck in all the old AA lingo. Ignore the old AA literature, strike out with something new. The question is, how can I best serve the alcoholic, regardless, and despite of, my own beliefs and prejudices about the AA program language and lingo. In AA speak, I decided to refer to the 12 Step principles as my Higher Power, which I believed would allow me to better carry the AA message to my fellow sufferers. Feeling overwhelmed by God popping up on every page of the Big Book? Even if I can personally ignore all the AA lingo & literature, the rest of the AA members can’t, won’t and don’t. You don’t want to hear me complain about the reasons. Coral Springs, FL. At “A Design for Living” Interventions, it is our mission to help individuals and families who are suffering from the devastating effects of addiction and substance abuse. Closed; Wheelchair Access; This meeting is closed; only those who have a desire to stop drinking may attend. We want to hear your story! Let’s work through this together.”. 1 other meeting at this location. Even though I am a “43 years sober” christian catholic (from birth) female alcoholic, I continue to be “amazed, enlightened & informed” by Alex’s willingness (necessity, he says) to share his personal story/struggle to find within the Big Book & Twelve Steps a design for “living sober” as an atheist. La nécessité de groupes AA laïques au Québec. The newcomers usually ask “How did you do it?” And the old-timers often say “Thank God for God.”. The Steps provide that for me, just as easily as I believe my grandmother could have. We give our clients the tools to succeed life after treatment in a safe and controlled environment that is healthy for early recovery. The non-human power requirement was my sticking-point, but no human I encountered could get me sober, so “something else” appeared necessary, whether I liked it or not. The same Step suggestions could have come from my wise old grandmother, which made it a lot easier for me not to get consumed by the God references in the Steps. But because of lessons I learned in Alcoholics Anonymous, I can greet my … Prayer did not get me sober. Author of Design for Living: Daily Meditations on the 12 Steps of A.A. for Atheists and Agnostics. AA Agnostica © 2020. Will Alex M’s books be available to buy at ICSAA Toronto next month? It is known that 95% of this population has not yet found the help they so desperately need. Tired of holding hands and mumbling the Lord’s Prayer at the end of every meeting? 428 NW 120th Dr. A Design for Living “…Intense, thought-provoking…” “Excellent!” “Lee is an extremely thorough, knowledgeable, fluid leader. I didn’t believe in God, but if there was one I hated him because he had killed my wife and made my life miserable. Reading the Big Book did not get me sober. Second, if I couldn’t stop analyzing and obsessing over the words God, Higher Power and spiritual in the Big Book, I’d be drinking soon and would never recover. Well, that’s exactly what this book is about. After her diagnosis, she turned to AA for help, https://www.aagrapevine.org/magazine/design-living. Despite my best efforts, I couldn’t force myself to believe in a god that didn’t exist. Thanks Constance. There is a solution for us atheists and agnostics too! If you are lost and not quite sure where to turn, call us so we can help you begin the process. I am sure his writings/reflections and personal experiences can help many people who either are or are not atheist, but are struggling as newcomer or old-timer with “the power”, to accompany them along this wonderful journey of “recovered from hopeless state of mind and body” on the road of “happy joyous and free”! Without the Steps I couldn’t be sober today. Our human resources, as marshalled by the will, were not sufficient; they failed utterly. I was unsure what a psychic change was, but I couldn’t deny that I needed “something more than human power” to have one since I had already proven it to myself. You must be an AA Grapevine member to access full stories and audio. Having a clean slate erased much of the constant “committee noise” in my head. My experience has shown me if I can show how parts of the AA God language (the amusing God disclaimers) open the door for any beliefs, or no belief, maybe the newcomer will stay in AA and find whatever useful sober life they can. First, I’ve got a problem that I can’t fix all by myself since I’ve already tried and failed; otherwise I wouldn’t be in AA. Call Us: 954.740.0622 for a FREE consultation. I can say that knowing Alex, thru his writings both in our step study group ongoing for five years and in his 2 published meditation books I became clear about my own need to define my personal higher power and finally decide “who or what IS that power?”. All my self-reliance, self-sufficiency and human will-power were unable to stop my drinking. My sponsor at the time, a born-again Christian no less, was wise beyond his years. Kurt. Unless this person can experience an entire psychic change there is very little hope of his recovery… the only effort necessary being that required to follow a few simple rules…. Sprinkled with a bit of gratitude, humility and humor, my life has never been better or more fulfilling. I believed that my best task on this earth was to live my life with as much decency, kindness, love, compassion, honor and integrity as I could. Feb. 24, Design For Living: Daily Meditations on the 12 Steps of A.A. for Atheists & Agnostics. Let’s not lose those newcomers who come into AA, flee and possibly die due to all the God talk (note that most folks who try AA once or twice and leave do NOT return, despite rumors to the contrary). Since so many newcomers flee A.A. because of the “God stuff,” Alex believes his responsibility is to share his experience on how recovery can be attained through A.A. when one does not believe in a god of someone else’s understanding. I knew from past experience that when I followed my purpose and principles, I received the gift of self-esteem, a feeling of worth, the ability to become comfortable in my own skin and the possibility of doing something for someone else. It is known that 95% of this population has not yet found the help they so desperately need. There are so many books on 12-Step interpretation and how-to-guides, it’s nice to see a growing offering of secular interpretations. Design For Living contains a collection of Alex’s writings on the Twelve Steps, selected from those that he wrote during his eight years co-hosting forty or so eight week Step Study sessions between 2009 and 2017. We had to find a power by which we could live, and it had to be a Power greater than ourselves… But where and how were we to find this Power? And last, Step 12 reminds me that I need to practice what has worked for so many in AA by consciously trying to improve my behavior toward others, which is the essence of the Golden Rule. Dr. Silkworth said I had an obsession to drink because I was forever restless, irritable and discontent, and alcohol gave me relief – that sense of ease and comfort. In the 1990s we could count on one hand, the non-theistic 12-Step interpretations in print. I think we’re still stuck in too many old AA ways. Those twelve principles, such as honesty, trust, integrity, courage, willingness, humility, compassion, fairness, kindness, tolerance, service and love, were clearly universal and secular in nature. Reading the Big Book did not get me sober. A design for Living. It is provided solely as a public information tool for Vermont Area 70 to display information about Alcoholics Anonymous in Area 70. In doing so, I realized I had always had a higher purpose and a set of higher principles in my life. Will hunt a bit more — trying to resist Amazon ueber Alles and am averse to e-books. That’s the idea. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 28I try each day to raise my heart and hands in thanks to God for I discovered I could create my own design for living by using the principles of the 12 Steps as an inspiration and guide for how I wanted to live my life. For me, I only “got where I am today” by going through the Steps with a wise, unbiased sponsor. Being a grade school science class stickler I have always wondered how there was room for something greater than myself inside of me. I find two of the most helpful things I learned in AA was 1) the importance to develop and use some type of personal daily ritual, or mantra, which will “relieve me of the bondage of self” — that reminder that I no longer need to be the Director of the Universe.

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